http://ChristBayLutheran.com

Greetings to the Youth of the Church

Welcome to the Youth Page of Christ of the Bay Lutheran Church. Exciting things are happening and we want you to be a part of them.

Ms. Kelly Waterman is our director of youth!  She can be contacted at (314) 223-1099.

Happy Birthday to :   

       September birthdays

                              Lily J. - October 28

                              D.J. - October 28                                                  

To add your October birthday, E-mail the webmaster at  ChristoftheBayLutheran@hotmail.com

Upcoming Events…. for Senior High Join us Sunday mornings at 9:15 a.m. for Teen Bible Study. The teens will watch the "Luther" video with the adult class.  You HAVE to come!!  Acolytes are needed for upcoming services.  Please let Vicar know when you are available to serve your Lord! LAST YOUTH MEETING - Wednesday, Oct. 1st Upcoming Youth Events Wednesday, Oct. 8th - 5:15 - 7:00 p.m. - Game Night Sunday, Oct. 12th - 10:30 - Youth event with Our Saviour's youth group - pizza and corn maze Wednesday, Oct. 15th - 5:15 - 7:00 p.m. - Plan and hang out Direct questions to kwaterman@newlhs.com (314) 223-1099 More Senior High events are being planned. Keep visiting this site for updates. Magazine for teen guys www.BreakawayMag.com  Look below for "Ask Mike" articles about issues facing teen boys. WHAT MAKES CURSE WORDS WRONG? Mike gives answers. by Michael Ross HEY MIKE! What’s the big deal about curse words? I mean, they’re just that — words. Where did they come from, and why do Christians condemn them? — D.K., Fontainelleau, France Before we check out what the Bible says, let’s crack open a Websters and look up some definitions of the word curse: "to swear at; use profane, blasphemous, or obscene language against; to bring evil or injury on; afflict." (Take note of two key words used here: against and afflict.) Now let’s pop over to James 3:9-11 for some insight: "With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be. Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring?" The fact is, D.K., words are far from harmless — especially the ones that curse, afflict and tear down. And it’s kinda obvious where they come from and why they’re off limits to Christians: SIN. Consider this about all the words that casually fly out of our mouths: • God wants us to have no part of sinful acts — which includes using bad language. He makes it clear that sin and holiness just don’t mix. "But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander and filthy language from your lips" Colossians 3:8. • Words — especially curse words — can be deadly. They can cut open a heart and destroy a person’s self-image. They can ignite a fire and drive someone to violence. The wrong kinds of words can cause incredible harm. That’s why James tells us to control our tongues. (See James 3:1-6.) • Christians must use words for good, not evil. Through our words, we can promote healing. We can express God’s love and show that He cares. "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen" Ephesians 4:29. HEY MIKE! I know that we’re supposed to wait until marriage to have sex, but I just don’t understand why. My girlfriend and I love each other deeply, and we know we are going to be together for the rest of our lives. Eventually, we plan to get married; it’s a lack of money that’s holding us back right now. Actually, we think of ourselves as being married; we just don’t have the little piece of paper that says we are. Why does God require us to have this in order to prove that we are committed to each other? —D.L., Porterville, Calif. I’m glad you used the word commitment to describe a marriage relationship. This word is the driving force behind that “little piece of paper” you mentioned—the one you don’t have. That paper represents a formal spiritual and civil order that sets marriage apart as an important, complex and sacred relationship. Not to diminish your love for your girlfriend, D.L., but it’s easy to feel ready for the sexual union that God established as a benefit of marriage. But marriage is much more. It includes the responsibilities of bearing and raising kids, the ability to provide and care for a family, and the maturity to remain committed to loving your spouse even when the feelings ebb and flow. The institution of marriage lets us know that all of this is serious business—and reminds us that until you’re ready for all of it, you’re not ready for its benefits. Of course, the document itself doesn’t prove a husband’s commitment to his wife; it’s the actions behind a marriage certificate that speak of a sacred, lifelong vow a couple makes before friends, family and God. The Lord blessed me with my beautiful wife, Tiffany. One of the first steps I took before getting engaged was to ask Tiffany’s dad for his permission to get married as well as his blessing on our life together. In the months that followed, we kept our relationship within sight of our families. We also accepted a season of patient waiting. In order for our love to blossom into what it’s supposed to be, we knew we had to wait. But most important of all, we knew that being obedient to God and His plan would prove our commitment to Him and to each other. The Bible is clear that God created sex as an incredible gift to be fully enjoyed within marriage. Why? As I said earlier, it’s about way more than pleasure. It’s a deeply spiritual, emotional and physical connection that binds a man and woman together and represents God’s character through its abilities to create life and foster intimacy. By God’s design, the marriage covenant is the only one strong enough to wield such a powerful gift. It’s not enough for a man and a woman to think of themselves as married or to merely feel as if they’re committed; they have to actually be these things. It may be tempting to sample early from sex, but as you’ve read in other Breakaway articles and heard in youth group, there are painful consequences for using this gift outside the context God created for it. Sometimes those consequences can even wreck a love that has the potential to last a lifetime. IS CHURCH IMPORTANT? Do I really have to go? Mike answers. by Michael Ross HEY MIKE! When Sunday morning rolls around, I never feel like going to church. Why is it so important to worship God in a sanctuary? Why can’t I do it on my own? —P.L., Altadena, Calif. Let’s be honest. We all wake up from time to time on Sunday with the strong temptation to worship at "Bedside Baptist" or "First Church of the Water Bed." But if we’re wise — and if we don’t want our parents to ground us for eternity — we fight off the temptation. Here’s why church is important: 1. There’s no such thing as the Lone Ranger Christian. Worshipping God is an interactive experience. It’s meant to be shared with others. Even if you can’t understand all the big words the pastor says—or if you can’t find the Book of Malachi if your life depended upon it — spending time in church teaches you that God’s family is a whole lot bigger than your own. Get this: Heaven is gonna be packed with all kinds of people praising and worshipping God. Church is a good place to prepare. What’s more, our church family keeps us accountable. 2. Going to church plugs you into God’s truth. Face it, we encounter a lot of distractions during the week — at school, on TV, in the computer games we play. Too many things can pull us away from God. Sunday mornings give us a spiritual ZAP — and get us back on track. 3. Church gives you a chance to be fed from God’s Word. Now you might say, "But, Mike, I can do that by reading the Bible; can’t I have a day off?" And I would ask, what if your Mom used that approach in cooking meals? "We feed you six days every week. Why don’t you take a day off from eating?" I don’t think you’d be amused. HEY MIKE! I can’t seem to get along with my parents. It seems as if I constantly lose my cool and get angry with them. What should I do? —J.D., Durham, N.H. First, try to figure out what’s making you mad and why you clash with Mom and Dad. Often it’s a matter of an unresolved issue: Maybe you feel as if they say no to your requests for later weekend curfews. Perhaps you feel as if they side with your brother or sister during disagreements. Or could it be a privacy issue? Do you need them to back off and give you more space? Once you nail what’s really bugging you, you’ve got to talk to God about it. Ask Him to show you what’s really going on and how to handle your struggle. Ask Him to help you change things from the inside out. Next, sit down with your parents and talk things through. Sort out your feelings and think through your conversation before you approach them. Above all, stay calm and show respect. I KEEP GETTING IN TROUBLE I want to do what's right, but I keep making bad choices and getting caught. How can I change? by Michael Ross HEY MIKE! While I attempt to do what’s right and to obey God, I often get caught up in bad choices. Before I know it, I’m doing dumb things: lying, cheating, fighting. What can I do to change? —T.C., Virginia Beach, Va. Even Christians with the best intentions can get off course from time to time. Check out what Christian scholar C.S. Lewis has to say about our struggle to follow God: “A live body is not one that never gets hurt, but one that can to some extent repair itself. In the same way a Christian is not a man who never goes wrong, but a man who is enabled to repent and pick himself up and begin over again after each stumble—because the Christ-life is inside him, repairing him all the time, enabling him to repeat (in some degree) the kind of voluntary death that Christ Himself carried out.” Making wise choices involves more than head knowledge. Pursuing authentic faith means applying God’s truth to everyday situations. And the wisest action a Christian can take is to admit a wrong he or she has committed, turn to Christ (confession), then start fresh again—in the right direction (repentance). I CAN'T STOP LYING Mike has tips to kick this habit. by Michael Ross HEY MIKE! I can’t stop lying. Just when I think I’ve kicked this habit, I start up again. I’ve been praying about it, and my mom and dad have given me some Bible verses to read. But I need additional support. Any ideas? —E.E., Mission Viejo, Calif. Daily prayer and Bible reading are important ways of battling any problem, but now you’re ready for the next step: getting the support of friends who will help you kick this habit. Try some positive reinforcement. How? Give this plan a try: • Find a trustworthy friend—a guy who is serious about his faith. • Confess your problem to him. • Ask him to pray for you every day for 30 days. Also, set a time at the end of each week to meet with your buddy. When the two of you get together, be willing to truthfully answer this question: Did you lie to anyone this week? • Agree to the following condition: Each lie you told during the week results in your doing a chore for your friend. In other words, if you told three lies, then you have to do three chores for him—taking out his garbage, cleaning his hamster’s cage . . . folding his underwear! • Reward yourself if you made it through the week without ever bending the truth. Go to the movies or to the video arcade at the mall. (Either your friend pays or you can ask your parents for an advance on your allowance.) Magazine for teen girls www.BrioMag.com Look below for some articles in a recent issue of Brio Magazine.

Crushes and Boyfriends by Susie Shellenberger Dear Susie: I recently attended a weekend youth conference and had a total life-changing experience. Before the worship service started, a guy came on stage and prayed for all of us. As soon as he started to pray, I fell in love with him. His prayer seemed so tender and sincere. The next day I noticed he was on stage again and was praying for a group of people. I watched him throughout the service and totally admired the way he was worshiping. I was falling in love with him because it was so obvious how much he really loved the Lord! He was jumping up and down and praising God. He didn’t care what anyone else thought; he was simply caught up in worship. Now I can’t quit thinking about him. Is it wrong to think about this mystery guy when I don’t even know his name? Wondering The Woodlands, Texas Dear Wondering: No, it’s not wrong, but be realistic about it. You don’t know him. It’s easy to get wrapped up in a spiritual moment when surrounded by tons of other teens who are also praising and worshiping God. To actually fall in love with someone, you need a deeper connection than admiration from a distance. You need to know him day in and day out; what he’s like during the week, etc. But the good news is that God is helping you see some wonderful, godly characteristics of the type of guy with whom you’ll want to spend the rest of your life. So instead of concentrating on this specific guy (whom you don’t know), concentrate instead on the qualities he has that are attractive to you and look for those qualities in guys you’ll date in the future. Dear Susie: I’ve wanted a boyfriend for three years, but I’ve never had one. Is it wrong to want a boyfriend this badly? I’ve talked to my friends about it, and they think it’s wrong for me to feel so desperate. Please help me. Confused Huntsville, Ala. Dear Confused: God created us as relational beings; therefore, it’s natural for you to desire a relationship with the opposite sex. But He also wants to help you develop godly boundaries and a holy mind-set. Instead of being consumed with thoughts of guys, ask God to help you focus more on Him. What’s the best way to change your focus? Dive into the Bible! Start memorizing Scripture. Pray about everything. Consider keeping a journal. Can you place your future dating life in God’s hands? If you’ll do that, you’ll experience His peace. If you don’t, you’ll continue to seem desperate and obsessed. Hugging Guys, Reading the Bible and a Mom Who Smokes by Susie Shellenberger Dear Susie: I have lots of guy friends, and I hug all of them. My mom thinks it’s inappropriate for me to be hugging on guys. I want to honor God and do what’s right, but I don’t get it. Confused Dear Confused: I love your friendly spirit. I’m guessing you probably have LOTS of friends—guys and girls. I sense that you’re a real people-person. That’s terrific! I also sense, from your point of view, that you’re simply being friendly. But here’s the deal: Guys are wired differently than we are. And not just some guys; all guys! Every single guy in the entire world has been created by God to become sexually enticed by sight and touch. It doesn’t matter if he’s a Christian or not; that’s simply how God made him. Most of the time, we girls just don’t get that. If we did, we’d hug a lot less, and we’d dress more modestly. Please don’t interpret this to the extreme. I can almost “hear” a few of our readers: “That’s crazy! I hugged my guy friend goodbye when we left camp last summer, and you’re telling me he was turned on by it?!” Maybe he wasn’t. Maybe he was. Who knows? But why not play it safe? We want to encourage our Christian guy friends, not tempt them. Keep discussing this with your mom. If you decide to hug a guy once in a while, please consider side-hugs only. Dear Susie: My boyfriend of more than a year recently broke up with me. He’s an amazing Christian and says that God needed him to end our relationship. I don’t understand why God would want us to break up, and He never sent any signs to me. I had no idea this was coming. I just don’t understand why God would do this to us. I feel so alone right now. Perplexed Dear Perplexed: One of two things is happening: Either your boyfriend wanted out of the relationship and is using God as a reason because he’s not courageous enough to share what’s really bothering him. OR God has actually spoken to him and told him to end the relationship. If your boyfriend is an honest guy and in tune with the Lord, I totally admire him for his obedience to Christ. Isn’t that ultimately the kind of man with whom you want to spend the rest of your life—one who listens to God, obeys Him and loves Him more than he does you? I know your hurt and confusion are exploding right now, but use this time to seek your own direction from God. God’s timing is not our own; He may have plans for the two of you for the future but just not the present. Dear Susie: Everywhere I turn, whether at my church or my Christian school, everyone’s saying, “You need to read the Bible to strengthen your faith.” Well, I want to read the Bible; I have my Bible ready to read; I just don’t know what to read! Should I simply open my Bible and start reading or begin at Genesis and go to Revelation? Spiritually Hungry Dear Spiritually Hungry: There’s really no right or wrong way to read the Bible, but here’s what I suggest: Start with the Gospel of John. Then read Proverbs (one chapter a day will fill a month). After that, go for Matthew, and then read Genesis, then head to Mark. Go back to the Old Testament and read Exodus, then Luke, then Leviticus. Next, head to Acts and then back to the Old Testament to Numbers and Deuteronomy. After that go to Romans. Keep reading a book or two in the New Testament and then the Old Testament and then back to the New Testament. Or consider reading through the Bible in a year. Dear Susie: My mom smokes. No matter how many times I tell her to try to stop, she just keeps smoking. My best friend won’t spend the night at my house anymore because of the smoke. What can I do to get my mom to stop? Smokesick Dear Smokesick: My heart goes out to you. I can only imagine how frustrated you must be. But I’m guessing your mom is even more frustrated. She knows she’s addicted and feels that quitting is hopeless. The honest truth is, you can’t get your mom to stop smoking. But you can pray for her. And you can keep talking to her about it. Consider making a date night—just the two of you. Let your mom know how much you love her and that you’re seriously concerned about her health. (You didn’t mention this in your letter, but I’m assuming you are concerned.) Suggest the two of you break a habit together (maybe you give up coffee or Coke, etc.). Ask if the two of you can start exercising together (to get her mind off of smoking and to replace an unhealthy habit with a healthy one). And most important, ask if the two of you can begin praying together. With God ALL things are possible. Memorize Scripture that talks about faith, and quote those verses to each other. (You might want to begin with Hebrews 11:1.) When she’s discouraged, pray right then. Dear Susie: Do you believe someone can fall in love more than once? Wondering Dear Wondering: Instead if using the phrase “falling in love,” I’d rather use “being in love.” And yes, I believe we can be in love several times in our lifetime. Take Elisabeth Elliot, for example. Elisabeth married Jim Elliot, missionary to Ecuador. Maybe you know his story; he was killed by Auca Indians when he tried to share the Gospel with them. She later remarried, but her second husband eventually died as well. She married a third time, and both are still alive. Elisabeth didn’t only love her first husband. She’s been in love multiple times. But Elisabeth knows a great secret: She understands that love is more than feeling; it’s a commitment. It’s dedicating your life to someone and striving to help that person become all God wants for him. Dear Susie: I recently had my boyfriend over to give him a birthday gift. My parents weren’t home, and the rule is that no one is allowed over if my parents are gone. He was only here for about 10 minutes when my parents pulled into the driveway. My brother started sneaking my boyfriend through the back door just as my mom came in. Now she’s mad. But here’s the thing: I only invited him over for a few minutes! My mom is convinced that we were up to something, and now she won’t let us go out any more. We didn’t do anything behind her back. How can I get her to listen to me and believe that we really can be trusted? Frustrated Prague, Okla. Dear Frustrated: Start by apologizing to your mom for breaking the rules. You won’t always agree with the rules your parents establish, but your job is to obey anyway—unless they ask you to do something immoral or against the law . . . like rob a bank. Your last statement shouts volumes to me: "We didn’t do anything behind her back." This tells me you’re still rationalizing and making excuses for what you did. The truth is, you did do something behind her back. You willingly broke her rule, and you planned it out ahead of time. You made a conscious decision to disobey her. Instead of focusing on how you can convince her to let you keep seeing your boyfriend, I wish you’d focus on, how you can keep from rationalizing other rules (from parents and from God) in the future. Building trust always takes time. She may not change her mind about you going out with your boyfriend, but do your to keep the lines of communication open. Write her a letter. And quit saying, "But we didn’t do anything!" That’s just proof that you still don’t get it! You DID break the rule; and you DID plan on it ahead of time. So take responsibility for your actions and seek her forgiveness. Dear Susie: I go to school with a guy who’s an atheist. The other day he told me that he wanted to become a Christian. I know this is an incredible opportunity, but I’m not sure what to say. How can I explain Christianity? Burdened Blountville, Tenn. Dear Burdened: There’s nothing more powerful than a personal testimony! So share how God has changed your own life. Explain how great it is to walk with the Creator of the universe every day and actually be on a first-name basis with Him! Share how comforting it is to know — really know — that God Almighty cares about all the details of your life . . . big and small. And a couple of books you may want to share with him are A Case for Christ by Lee Strobel and More Evidence That Demands a Verdict by Josh McDowell. Both were written by men who thought Christianity was a fairy tale . . . until they actually did the research. Now they’re both dynamic Christians. Dear Susie: I have been trying to be friends with the girls in my class, but no one seems to want to be my friend. What am I doing wrong? Miss Understood Dear Miss Understood: You’re on the right track in trying to be friendly to everyone. I’m glad to know you’re not excluding people. But I’m wondering what specifically you’re doing to be friendly. Think about the kind of friend you’d like to have . . . then try to be that kind of friend to others. Here are some key elements that are important in making friends. • Learn how to be a good conversationalist. Ask questions. Get the other person talking. • Be a good listener. No one enjoys being around someone who talks about herself all the time. • Affirm those around you. Think of something you can compliment each person on. “That color looks great on you!” “Hey, I heard you aced the test. Way to go!” “Hi. Good to see you.” Of course, there are more elements involved in making friends than these three. Check out our Web site this month for “Making Friends.” I think you’ll enjoy it .

Brio Magazine's Dear Susie by Susie Schellenberger

Dear Susie:
I’m not very popular in school. I fight with my parents, and I feel as though my life is totally worthless. You’ll probably tell me to pray or read the Bible, but how can I get rid of the constant tears and hopelessness? I want to have a positive self-esteem and feel good about myself!
Hopeless

Dear Hopeless:
Yes, I do want you to pray and read the Bible. Know why? Because a big part of healthy self-esteem comes from a strong, growing, intimate relationship with your heavenly Father. Popularity is fleeting. Arguments come and go. But a strong relationship with God is something concrete. It’s something you can depend on.

Take a peek at Psalm 139 — the entire chapter. Read it. When you’ve finished, read it again. Then choose a verse to memorize. Make it your goal to memorize the entire chapter by Thanksgiving.

Why?

Because there’s so much power in the Word of God. And the more you apply it to your life and actually believe it, the more it will change your thinking.

Are there specific things you and your parents fight about over and over? Or are you simply fighting about everything? If you’re not able to communicate with them without fighting, consider putting your feelings in a letter to them. Learning to communicate in a civilized way is a must if you’re going to get along as a family.

You state that you’re not very popular at school. Do you have friends at church? Are you plugged into a youth group? Are you a member of a Bible study? I’m hoping there are Christian teens around you with whom you do feel comfortable with and can be friends.

As you probably know, low self-esteem often comes from feeling insecure. I think by saturating yourself with Psalm 139, you’ll realize how valuable you are in God’s eyes. He loves you more than you can even comprehend. Ask Him to help you bask in that love and learn to love yourself as He loves you.

God wired us for relationships. You may already be reading your Bible and have a strong relationship with Christ, but perhaps other people are stomping on your self-esteem. That’s not your fault. Again, ask God to teach you how to see yourself through His eyes, so you won’t put so much stock in what others think.

And by the way, the Brio staff loves you, too!

Dear Susie:
I was on the Internet today and read some of your other “Dear Susie articles.” You said that wearing jeans isn’t a sin. I disagree with that. I like wearing pants, but I wear them only when I’m doing an activity that requires it.

I don’t think girls should look like boys, though some people will say just because a girl wears pants doesn’t make her look like a boy. The pants made for girls today are tight and show so much figure that it can be dangerous. I don’t want to offend anyone by this e-mail, and I have nothing against you, Susie. I just disagree.
Frustrated With Susie

Dear Frustrated With Susie:
I’m glad you shared your thoughts with us. I agree that it can be hard to find fashionable styles that aren’t suggestive, but it’s not impossible. I see more Christians dressed appropriately and stylishly than I see Christians dressed inappropriately.

We’ll just have to “agree to disagree” on whether wearing pants is a sin. That doesn’t necessarily mean one of us is wrong and the other is right. It means that we interpret this issue differently. And that’s OK. Sharing varied opinions, while still loving each other, is part of what makes the body of Christ so exciting!

Calling All Teens!

No doubt about it: The Da Vinci Code is full of adrenaline-pumping chases, intriguing mystery and a cool story line that keeps readers turning the pages. And the claims made by the fictional characters are so truthful-sounding that the lines between fiction and fact get blurred fast. Which is why people who don't really know the Word of God or church history can get duped.

Nonetheless, the runaway popularity of The Da Vinci Code has also created an amazing opportunity to share truth with seekers. Even people who ordinarily steer clear of "religious" discussions have lots of questions after encountering The Da Vinci Code story.

The movie version ends with the words, "Seek the Truth." Great idea! If you take a few minutes to check out the info on this Web site, you will find the truth: straightforward facts about Jesus' life and mission, His relationship with His disciples (including Mary Magdalene), the purpose of His death and resurrection, and early church history. And once you're grounded in the truth, you can help others find it, too.

Jesus' life and teachings are amazing enough. They don't need any fairytale add-ons. So, take a stand for the truth . . . and help your friends to find it, too!

Holes in The Code

Should I Heart or Hate Pop Culture?